Communication Green Flags
Building relationships can be an exhilarating and complex yet fulfilling experience. Because of the innate desire to feel secure in a relationship, we often find ourselves stumbling over interactions that feel less than pleasant and serve to be the red flags for why we shouldn’t settle into our relationships.
While identifying warning signs is a necessary process, we often place so much focus on these red flags and before we know it, we are struggling to simply enjoy the excitement and fun that comes with the relationship.
I’d like to bring some balance by sharing some relationship green flags that can help you ease into building trust within your relationships. There are so many positive aspects of interaction that can be considered, but I would like to highlight the following five:
1. Consistency. After the initial “get to know you” stages, you should begin having some understanding of what you can expect from that other individual. This may be in the sense of communication, support, behaviors, etc. While we may never be able to fully learn a person, you should begin to learn how they experience and respond to life.
2. Boundaries are Respected: Boundary setting is probably one of the most important tasks in a relationship, but the ability to respect the boundaries that have been set can take a relationship much further. Feeling comfortable with communicating your boundaries and having the other person respond with a mutual commitment to maintaining those boundaries is another green flag to let you know your relationship is moving in the right direction!
3. Supports your Personal Growth. We all want those we have relationships with to provide some level of support while we strive toward achieving our accomplishments. The way support is expressed, and the level of support may vary greatly between each relationship, but the important part is knowing that those who you are connected to share the desire to see you thriving and growing. For some, this may include being up close and personal as you navigate your journey to success, and for others, this may simply mean being able to congratulate you with genuine happiness in your success. You can be the judge of what support means to you, but as long as your relationships are not hindering your growth, you can consider it another green flag to settle right in!
4. Disagreements are handled maturely. “We’re not fighting, we’re having a heated discussion.” This statement is often used to cover up some serious communication breakdowns, but it’s actually something to be considered! Naturally, relationships will bring out some of our most intense emotions and they are not always easy to express or control, but there should be a basic level of respect and maturity while dealing with conflict. A relationship tested is a relationship proven, so if you feel disagreements are handled in a way that promotes respect and growth, your relationship just may be on its way to enduring the test of time!
5. Shared desires for the relationships. One thing that unites us in the initial stages of the relationship is a shared interest or common desire for what the relationship would provide. Having a clear understanding of the roles you will play, expectations of one another, and guidelines for how to engage in the relationship will set the tone for longevity!
Whether it’s with a romantic partner, coworker, family member, or friend, these tips can be applied to ease your mind about the direction of your relationship. Remember, relationships are an evolving process so never expect any one area to be perfect. Do make sure you take a moment to acknowledge what is going well and use these areas to help strengthen and grow your relationships!
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